I had some Mommy Guilt going on last week. Being the end of the month, I had some important deadlines to hit and found myself overwhelmed with work at various points in time. Being overwhelmed with work usually leaves less time for playing, reading and the general fun sides of parenting than I prefer. But, the work had to get done.
And so, the Mommy Guilt started to creep in. I started thinking of all the things I could have been doing other than working. I could have been cleaning my house. Or baking cookies with BigBrother. Or doing puzzles with LittleBrother. (Playing outside wasn’t an option as it was nasty all week. At least I had that in my favor.)
And then I started thinking about all the things that Moms should do with their kids. You know, things that I simply have no desire to do. Mainly crafts. I’ve written about crafts before and how BigBrother seems to inherited my lack of a crafting gene. I just don’t really like crafts. I understand their purpose. I do like that they take up time. I do like that children gain tactile skills and learn other things when doing crafts. But I hate them. It figures, then, that while I was lamenting over things that I wanted to be doing with the boys (practicing t-ball, doing puzzles, coloring (which is not the same as crafting), running through fields of flowers), I was also feeling guilty for not doing things that I didn’t even want to do.
I was still feeling guilty when I went to a Dos de Mayo party at my friend Mandy’s house on Saturday evening. (What? You don’t know about Dos de Mayo? It’s what you do when Cinco de Mayo falls on a Tuesday and you know that there’s no way you’re staying up past bedtime on a weeknight.) Mandy had planned a little sombrero craft with a paper cup, a little paper plate, fuzzy crafting balls and glue. After the kids finished drowning their craft in glue, we sat back down at the table and someone let it slip.
“I hate crafts.”
I don’t remember who said it first but it’s like the heavens opened and sun shone down upon that table out in the backyard. Angels sang. Trumpets sounded. And then another friend of ours said, “Me too.” I think my jaw dropped before I admitted the same thing (and admitted that I was planning on blogging about feeling like a bad mom for not enjoying crafts this week). Of course, the husbands among us didn’t understand why we did them if we didn’t like them but, well, I can assure you that FireDad doesn’t enjoy them either. So, someone has to do it. We talked about it for a few minutes; those reasons that we do crafts with our children even though we really don’t enjoy the process.
And I felt like less of a Bad Mom.
This week, thus far, I have done some things that I prefer doing with the boys. We’ve finally made it through our pile of new books. We played some games. We sang and danced to make videos on the webcam. And I don’t think we’ll do any crafts this week. I’m not good at them. I don’t enjoy them. And really, there are other ways to learn. Maybe we’ll start doing young learning science experiments or something with letters. You know, things that I’m good at and things that I enjoy.
But I’m apparently not a Bad Mom for disliking crafts. (I’m also not a Bad Mom because my house is messy!) Hooray!
10 Responses to “Maybe I’m Not a Bad Mom”
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Oh thank God, I hate crafts too. Of course, I have a kindergartener so I HAVE to do crafts, it’s the law. And yes, my husband too has said, “Why do you do crafts?” Because we’re good moms!
ginabads last blog post..Forgiveness
See, it’s not that YOU have to do the crafts with them, but you need to find someone who loves crafts to trade off skills. Not everyone likes everything, hence taking a village to raise a child. When they are feeling crafty, send them down to me. I LOVE crafts (as witnessed by the fact I have a craft room in my house). I’ll send them back well and fully glittered and gluey (oh and full of sugar and candy, but that’s what ‘Aunts’ do). and Jeff will take them for a ride on the….uh, never mind….
If everyone was the same, it would be boring!
I love crafts but then again, I also have an 11 year old girl… with the two boys at home, I don’t think you’ll have to do a lot of crafts! Once you get to elementary school age, that will change some with projects and arts stuff but I think you’ll dodge the craft bullet anyway!
I *hate* crafts with complicated instructions…see Oriental Trading. I’ve had the best success with open-ended crafts. Best one is glue, glitter and construction paper — make a design with glue, pour glitter, let dry. Done!
Musings from Mes last blog post..Mampedia.com Sitewarming Party, Friday, May 8 from 9 to 10 p.m.
Twitter: katie_in_ma
says:
Um, well, I have to confess that I LOVE crafts. But that doesn’t mean that EVERYONE has to! Sheesh – how boring would that be? Chris over at Notes From the Trenches posted a similar blog this week about little ways she (thinks she) fails and it was AMAZING the way everyone came out of the woodwork for a group therapy session. None of us are alone, and that feels amazing!
I hate crafts too!! I HATE them. I usually take my son to the library or to Michael’s when they do crafts. I find that I hate them less when all the pieces are lying out in front of us and ready to go. And then I try my best not to feel guilty for not being a crafty mom.
Upstatemomof3s last blog post..He Did The Laundry!!!!
Ha, I’m a bad mom because I would much RATHER do crafts than puzzles, bake, or vacuum.
(And geez louise woman, you are an amazing mother, glue or no glue.)
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See, I love crafts but never do any with Jamison. Now I feel like a bad mom! You’ve inspired me, must come up with a craft for this week.
Ever try painting the inside of your hand with Elmer’s glue and then peel, while pretending like your skin is falling off? No? Um, I heard it can be sort of fun. From who? Oh, I dunno, some sicko, I guess. She was a “bad mom,” too