My husband has been pestering the ever-living daylights out of me. “What do you want for your birthday? What do you want for your birthday? What do you want for your birthday now? And then? And then?” No, really. He actually texted me a series of “and thens” like we were in an updated version of Dude, Where’s My Car? I laughed, but I still didn’t really have an answer.
You see, I don’t really want for anything. If I ever want something, I kind of save my money and buy it myself. I also, most certainly, don’t need anything. In fact, I probably need to get rid of lots of things, but that’s a different post for a different decade.
I finally came up with a list to share with my husband. I will be getting one of these things for my birthday which falls on April 25th.
I actually blame this recent and deep Baby Fever on the final episode of How I Met Your Mother. Barney? With that baby? My heart and ovaries exploded. Oh, and all of the pregnant people in my life. Thanks, pregnant friends. Nevermind the fact that I can’t actually have any more babies. Details. Gimme all the babies.
How cute would Callie be with a wittle-bitty puppy-wuppy?
No babies, you say? Fine! ALL THE PUPPIES! More specifically, a whole flipping gaggle of German Shepherd puppies, please. I want eleventy Callies running all over the place and jumping at the ceiling fan and breaking the windows and barking at everything so they can each have their own hashtag. #thingseverydogjennahasbarksat or something.
3. BABY GOATS!
Fine. No babies. No puppies. I WANT A BABY GOAT. So bouncy! Like me! Let’s jump on the dog! And the trampoline! And fall over! And be entirely too freaking cute! (Found via The Mary Sue and sent to me by My Karen.)
4. KEURIG BECAUSE FANCY COFFEE!
What my husband thinks of a Keurig.
My husband has been adamant that we would not do well with a Keurig in this house. “We drink too much coffee for it to be cost effective.” And for a really long time, he was right. But I recently cut back severely on my coffee intake due to a change in medication. I now have one mug (or less) in the morning and sometimes, but not everyday, a mid-day or post-dinner half-mug. He’s still not sold on the Keurig itself and instead has been looking at this Hamilton Beach version that still offers a full pot of coffee as his argument is that he drinks enough coffee when he’s home to warrant a real coffee pot. And holidays and parties and get togethers and when I fall off the coffee-reduction-horse because it’s bound to happen. Whatever, I just want fancy coffee, okay?
5. CHEESE, CRACKERS, A GRAPE, A PHONE, BAGELS AND DONUTS, and SHORTS.
And some diamond shoes.
6. MY HUSBAND TO RUN THE COLUMBUS HALF MARATHON WITH ME.
Us in 2013 after I finished the Columbus Half Marathon. In 2014, he’ll look just as sweaty! YAY!
Lesson: When you’ve been pestering your wife for weeks about what she wants about her birthday, and she says, “Hey, I just booked our hotel for the Columbus Half Marathon in October. I got a two room suite with a pull out couch for the boys in case we take them, weather permitting,” your reply shouldn’t be, “But what if I want to run it with you?” Because she will flip out and bounce all over the kitchen and exclaim, “THIS! THIS IS WHAT I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY! THIS RIGHT HERE! IT’S GOING TO BE SO FUN! IT’S GOING TO BE EPIC! BEST BIRTHDAY EVER! I ALREADY LOVE BEING THIRTY-THREE!” And you’ll sigh, and tweet about running your flappity-flap, and start looking up training plans because you’ve met your wife and you know that once you say something, you have to follow through and, OMG! BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!
So. I’ll be getting one of the things on this list. Can you guess which one it will be? Because I already took him shopping and helped him pick out running shoes. Oh yes I did.