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Dispatches from Camp: Lime

Jul 262011

After we hiked down the hill from the Children’s Tabernacle and made our way to our cottage as soon as the boys’ morning class, we sat at the table and ate our lunch. I asked the same question I ask everyday over lunch: “What did you learn during class today?”

BigBrother replied, “About limes.”

I stopped chewing my bite of tomato sandwich and looked at him. “Limes?”

He nodded, but didn’t offer up any other information. I pressed ahead. “What about limes?” I tried to think of some comparison of lime to our faith (or maybe a lack thereof) or being a cheerful Christian or something. If I would have had my phone, which is upstairs in our cottage balanced on a half-wall so it can get 3G service and I can work, I would have Googled limes in the Bible. So, I just waited for him to explain.

He cleared his throat, obviously getting ready for a BigBrother-esque type tale. “Well, Jesus was at a party, you know. Like a big one. Right. And they ran out of lime. Because there were so many people. And so Jesus turned a lot of water into lime. You know, like you do. That’s what we learned.”

I nodded. “Ah, yes, the story of Jesus turning the water into lime. I know that one well.”

And, no, I didn’t correct him — on the lime/wine word play or the me not quite being on the same level as Jesus.

To be fair, every time I get a glass of water, I put a squirt or two of lime into my glass. I have an issue with not consuming enough water, and the lime gives it some extra flavor, thus causing me to drink more. So his whole concept of water and lime being hand-in-hand is of my doing.

A New Llama, Llama Book!

Parenting 5 Responses »

May 162011

I was working in the office-slash-playroom on Friday. (You don’t have an office-slash-playroom? Smart you.) The boys were behaving as well as they can at any given time, meaning that they were playing nicely but being loud. Ah, genetics. I was half-listening, half-editing when I heard something that made me tune into the little guys.

“Yeah, you don’t want to get burned by the llama!”

Huh.

“Oh, save me from the llama!”

Interesting.

I mean, camels can bite your hair and I have heard that llamas can be feisty, but I didn’t really know they had blipped onto the radar of my kids in a super hero (or villain) fashion. We have the Llama, Llama books, of course. And I hate Llama, Lama Red Pajama because that little snot teaches my kids bad things about bedtime routines. But again, they didn’t seem all that drawn to the books, barely ranking in their Occasionally Ask for But Ignore You When You Read It book list.

So, I bit. I asked.

“Hey guys, what’s llama?”

BigBrother paused and turned to look up at me. “You know. It’s hot.”

“Uh, no. You’re going to have to explain a bit more.”

“It’s kind of like fire. And if you fall in it, you die.”

Light bulb.

“Oh! You mean lava!”

“Yes! Lava!”

LittleBrother, having just watched this exchange, shook his head. “No, it’s llama. Burning hot llama.”

I didn’t correct him. Though his brother did for the rest of the afternoon, thus causing arguments all day. I wish I had listened for just a little bit longer to realize on my own that llama meant lava. Then I could have let it go for quite some time and played along when we play Super Mario Bros. Wii together.

All the same, I think Anna Dewdney should write a new Llama book. Llama, Llama, Burning Hot Llama. Hopefully she makes this one less whiny and annoying and more crazy llama in your face. I’d like that book much better.