My house is not quiet. I’d blame the kids but if you have met me, well, you know that I contribute to the non-quiet-ness simply by being present in a room. I’m kind of loud. I don’t mean to be loud. I’d actually love to be more quiet, more reserved. And I am when I first meet people. Once I trust you? All bets are off. I don’t really have an inside voice. Laugh? Loud. Cry? Loud. Talk? Loud. Whisper? Yes, I even have a loud whisper. It’s no surprise that my children are equally loud.

But that doesn’t mean I never get Noised Out.

Toys make noise. The exhaust fan in the kitchen makes noise while I’m cooking supper. The dryer buzzes. My cell phone beeps. The neighbor doesn’t have a muffler. And while I’m glad that the birds are back and that Spring is near, man, those birds are loud at times. Sometimes, I just need quiet.

I don’t get much.

Sometimes I wake up before the boys do, though it’s hard to get up before BigBrother. His internal clock is set for Early O’Clock. Lately he’s been struggling to stay in his room until his digital clock reads seven-zero-zero. But sometimes I get to have a cup of coffee by myself in the wee hours of the morning, thinking about my day and planning our adventures before they begin.

Sometimes I get to have a glass of wine by myself at night with the television off, the radio off, the noisy toys quieted and the children fast asleep. Sometimes I get to read in my bed during those hours as well, every third night finding FireDad sleeping at the fire station for his usual shift. Sometimes the kids even leave me alone in the shower, the hot water erasing the stress of the moment. Those moments, however, don’t last long. What is it about a shower that sends absolutely everybody in the house to the bathroom door? I need a sound proof bathroom. That’s the fix.

To be honest though, I can only stand so much quiet. Yes, I crave it. But when it’s too quiet, I hear little noises. The sound of silence is actually too loud for me as we discovered in January when our electricity went out due to the snow storm. It’s deafening, that silence of nothingness. And so, while I get overwhelmed sometimes, I’ll take the noise even if it means that I sometimes get startled and spill my coffee on my robe, pants or new floor. The noise, of course, is just a sign that we’re happy and healthy and able to make that noise.

Or, that’s what I tell myself on the days that I want to run off and buy ear plugs.

For more quiet, visit today’s challenge at I Should Be Folding Laundry. Next week’s challenge is reaching. Hmm.

Hope springs eternal. Or, rather, Spring makes me hopeful.

I’m tired of being stuck inside. I’m tired of the snow. I’m tired, mainly. I need fresh air that doesn’t burn my lungs. I need a little more green, it being my favorite color and all. I need more color than various shades of grey. I need Spring.

I’ve been feeling kind of down in the dumps, overwhelmed with our four walls and constant company. It’s not that I’d just turn my kids loose outdoors and not watch them; it’s that we need more space for our voices, our personalities. We need to stretch and run and spend that energy. It’s been a hard winter, too, having lost two family members. I need that hopeful feeling that the new growth of Spring brings.

And it’s so close I can almost taste it.

Buds. They’re coming. I can almost imagine the blooms that they will soon bring. I can almost imagine our apple tree in full bloom, buds pushing up through the grass. I can almost imagine grass. Snow is melting, here and there, and I can see the dull, dark browns and green from a winter of halted growth. Will it green up soon? Will it soon outnumber the patches, piles and inches of endless white?

I have this lament every year, like last year when I was worried about snow falling on my day lily sprouts. They came up on March 17th. That’s only thirteen days from now. Surely that means that hope is just around the corner, just waiting to be discovered. Right? Surely that means that the sun will shine more than just today. That soon the snow will melt. That maybe, just maybe, Spring really is coming this year, not leaving us in this frozen tundra of gloom and doom forever. Right?

This has been one of the worst winters I can remember; not just snow wise but emotionally as well. Maybe not the worst but it ranks up there quite high. I’m ready to feel new again myself. To shed my winter coat and stand with my face to the sun and let the bright rays of hope remind me of who I am and what it is that I am doing here.

I’m ready. Is Spring?

_
[For more hopeful photos, visit today's You Capture Challenge at I Should Be Folding Laundry.]

We’re talking about work this week for the You Capture challenge. I used to have an office. Then we had another baby, fondly known as LittleBrother, and I now split the office with the boy’s playroom. But, really, that doesn’t work well for me or BigBrother who has taken over the family desktop. So, I do most of my work in this little corner of the living room.

In that photo you can see two laptops, two cell phones, my card reader, my favorite pen, a cup of coffee and the corner of the couch that I do most of my leaning on. It is here that I write, edit, e-mail, network, procrastinate, tweet, play Bejeweled Blitz, press refresh and generally take on the world of a freelance writer and editor. I have started doing some work at the dining room table again but I prefer the couch. (Speaking of, we’re in the market for a new couch and a new recliner. Anyone know of any good deals?)

What you don’t see in the first picture is the mess that my living room becomes while I do my morning work. Here’s a small glimpse.

I would have shown you my entire living room at that point yesterday but it was trashed. The Duplo blocks were out. More puzzles were at my feet as LittleBrother is deep in a puzzle phase. All of our cars were strewn across the floor. The Veggie Tales castle was turned over as was the fire department. And two new sleeping bags were thrown into the mix as well. The truth is that I spend my mornings doing work and building puzzles or coloring or racing or having my toes run over all at the same time. I’m working but I’m also playing with and/or parenting my boys. I had this idea, prior to doing it, that working from home was easy and somewhat glamorous. It is neither. Rewarding? Sure. Comfortable? Totally. But it’s nothing that I had imagined.

Anyway, thanks to all of this…

…I haven’t been working outside the home very much. I was called off on Saturday and almost didn’t work yesterday. I did manage to get out and photograph a game. As I was editing some photos, I took a picture of me, hard at work, which, minus the couch, doesn’t really look much different than what I’m doing at home, now does it?

Things you don’t see me working on this week in this post include: seven loads of laundry, baking three dozen cookies, trying new recipes, Swiffering our new floor and generally helping run the household. (That said, my loving husband did all of the shoveling this week.)

What I hope you see in some of these jokes is that I love the work I do, both at home and away. I am a lucky woman in that regard. I hope that continues. If you want to see some other work photos, visit this week’s You Capture challenge over at I Should Be Folding Laundry. Next week’s challenge is kisses. Sounds fun to me!

Now back to work. Really! I’m at This Woman’s Work’s house talking about our book. WOO!

I’ve been absent from the You Capture challenges for awhile, having been caught up in life (and death). When I saw that this week’s challenge was faces, I thought I’d take advantage of the opportunity to get some new face collages of my kids. BigBrother is a Face Making King. LittleBrother is just learning what faces go with what emotions. They both enjoyed a bit of time in front of the camera.

BigBrother made five really good faces: left top, sad; left bottom, angry; center, happy; right top, silly; right bottom, surprised.

Then I asked him to make his favorite face and he ended up with this gem:

Next came LittleBrother’s turn. He was distracted by BigBrother and FireDad. Plus his attention span is a bit shorter, being only two, but he came up with three great faces: left, happy; right top, sad; right bottom, surprised.

And then he melted down which is a perfect sad face all of its own.

I enjoyed this challenge and I think the boys did, too. You know, until LittleBrother melted. Life is hard when you’re two.

Next week’s challenge is work. I’m not sure how to approach this one as I work six different jobs (five freelancing, one out-of-home) and, you know, care for these two wild and crazy guys all day long. I think it will be an interesting challenge and I hope to put a little bit of thought and time into it. I’ll be interested to see what everyone else comes up with as well. Until then, check out everyone else’s face pictures today.